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eirana_reganTitle: Roll With Us: The Sad Tale of Kris Allen and His Dysfunctional Family
Summary: Hi, I'm Kris Allen. I like music - and plaid. I have a dad named Neil and a mom named Kim. I’m the oldest of three kids. I have a sister named Kesha, who’s unbelievably smart but with a strong rebellious streak, and a little snot of a brother named Justin. As for me? I’m the sane one.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 870
Disclaimer: Faker than my magenta-streaked hair.
Characters: The usual suspects, along with a few guest (pop)stars.
Warnings: Insanity.
Notes: Marien, this is all your fault; you’re not sorry for it one little bit.
Originally posted 3/1/11
~*~
Kris cannot believe Kesha (or Ke$ha, rather, because she’s being edgy or something).
This is his date night. It has been his date night for the past five months, and it will be his date night for many more months to come. Kris is probably getting ahead of himself there, but that’s not the point.
The point is, Kesha is evil and terrible and the worst sister ever.
Their parents are away for the weekend, and the second Kris had heard about it, he’d called Adam and told him that it was the moment. He and Adam have been going out for a while - like, serious relationship while - and they’ve talked about this.
This, as in going all the way. They’ve done a lot - at times when they really shouldn’t have done anything at all - but they haven’t taken that last step. It was just never the right time. So, when Kris’ parents had said they were leaving, he’d jumped at the opportunity.
Kesha would leave them alone because she’s awesome like that, he’d ship Justin off to one of his little friends for a sleepover, and he and Adam would be all alone in the house.
Then the plan goes to hell and Kris decides to take back what he said about Kesha being awesome.
He loves his sister, he really does. She’s highly intelligent, loads of fun, and one of his best friends, on top of being the reason he met Adam in the first place. But she is being so unfair right now.
She knows what Kris’ plans for the weekend were. She knows how much he’s been looking forward to it. And what does she do? She sneaks out with only a note telling him where his wayward little sister has run off to.
Not a goodbye, not a warning, just a little piece of paper covered in glitter - that smells like cotton candy, most likely courtesy of Kesha’s BFF Katy Perry - saying that she’s heading out and not to wait up. Oh, and good luck with the little snot.
The little snot, of course, is their baby brother, Justin. He’s sixteen, the baby of the family compared to Kesha’s twenty-two and Kris’ twenty-four. His parents hadn’t planned to have another kid, but Justin surprised all of them.
He’s almost taller than Kris now, something he reminds them all about constantly. Justin’s kind of full of himself, which the droves of girls at his school who go nuts over him don’t help, and a bit spoiled. He’s the typical cocksure, idiotic teenage boy.
As much as Justin gets on Kris’ nerves, he has to admit that he loves his stupid baby brother, demanding and irritating as he can be. The love is very much a mutual one; Justin adores his big brother. He and Kesha are always at each other’s throats, but the two of them love and respect Kris. Most of the time. The respect part is a bit iffy.
Case in point, this weekend. His and Adam’s weekend. His and Adam’s We-Are-Finally-Alone-And-Can-Have-Amazing-Sex-All-Weekend weekend.
Ruined in mere seconds thanks to his darling siblings, who knew all about his weekend plans. Kesha’s probably off drowning in glitter and grinding with Katy at a club somewhere, and Justin’s up in his room being a sulky teenager because Selena just dumped him. He is also demanding muffins.
Kris’ weekend plans went from “lots of hot sex with his boyfriend” to “bake muffins and baby-sit whiny little brother.” Where did it all go wrong?
“Kriiiiiis!”
Kris lets his head hit the kitchen counter with a loud thunk. Adam laughs, reaching over to rub the back of his neck soothingly.
“It’s okay, baby. There’ll be other weekends.”
“But it was supposed to be this one,” he whines, leaning into his boyfriend and hiding his face in his neck.
He hums sympathetically, burying a hand in Kris’ hair and rubbing some of the tension away. “I know. I’m not exactly happy either, but the kid just got his heart broken. Helping him out’s more important than getting ours.”
Kris sighs loudly. “You’re right. I know you’re right.”
“Kriiiiiis!”
“But does he have to be such a little snot about it?” he grumbles, burrowing deeper into Adam’s arms like it’ll block out Justin’s calls.
“He wouldn’t be Justin if he didn’t,” he says, kissing the top of Kris’ head before pushing him out of his embrace. “Now stop whining and make him his damn muffins; maybe then he’ll shut up.”
~*~
Summary: Hi, I'm Kris Allen. I like music - and plaid. I have a dad named Neil and a mom named Kim. I’m the oldest of three kids. I have a sister named Kesha, who’s unbelievably smart but with a strong rebellious streak, and a little snot of a brother named Justin. As for me? I’m the sane one.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 870
Disclaimer: Faker than my magenta-streaked hair.
Characters: The usual suspects, along with a few guest (pop)stars.
Warnings: Insanity.
Notes: Marien, this is all your fault; you’re not sorry for it one little bit.
Originally posted 3/1/11
~*~
Kris cannot believe Kesha (or Ke$ha, rather, because she’s being edgy or something).
This is his date night. It has been his date night for the past five months, and it will be his date night for many more months to come. Kris is probably getting ahead of himself there, but that’s not the point.
The point is, Kesha is evil and terrible and the worst sister ever.
Their parents are away for the weekend, and the second Kris had heard about it, he’d called Adam and told him that it was the moment. He and Adam have been going out for a while - like, serious relationship while - and they’ve talked about this.
This, as in going all the way. They’ve done a lot - at times when they really shouldn’t have done anything at all - but they haven’t taken that last step. It was just never the right time. So, when Kris’ parents had said they were leaving, he’d jumped at the opportunity.
Kesha would leave them alone because she’s awesome like that, he’d ship Justin off to one of his little friends for a sleepover, and he and Adam would be all alone in the house.
Then the plan goes to hell and Kris decides to take back what he said about Kesha being awesome.
He loves his sister, he really does. She’s highly intelligent, loads of fun, and one of his best friends, on top of being the reason he met Adam in the first place. But she is being so unfair right now.
She knows what Kris’ plans for the weekend were. She knows how much he’s been looking forward to it. And what does she do? She sneaks out with only a note telling him where his wayward little sister has run off to.
Not a goodbye, not a warning, just a little piece of paper covered in glitter - that smells like cotton candy, most likely courtesy of Kesha’s BFF Katy Perry - saying that she’s heading out and not to wait up. Oh, and good luck with the little snot.
The little snot, of course, is their baby brother, Justin. He’s sixteen, the baby of the family compared to Kesha’s twenty-two and Kris’ twenty-four. His parents hadn’t planned to have another kid, but Justin surprised all of them.
He’s almost taller than Kris now, something he reminds them all about constantly. Justin’s kind of full of himself, which the droves of girls at his school who go nuts over him don’t help, and a bit spoiled. He’s the typical cocksure, idiotic teenage boy.
As much as Justin gets on Kris’ nerves, he has to admit that he loves his stupid baby brother, demanding and irritating as he can be. The love is very much a mutual one; Justin adores his big brother. He and Kesha are always at each other’s throats, but the two of them love and respect Kris. Most of the time. The respect part is a bit iffy.
Case in point, this weekend. His and Adam’s weekend. His and Adam’s We-Are-Finally-Alone-And-Can-Have-Amazing-Sex-All-Weekend weekend.
Ruined in mere seconds thanks to his darling siblings, who knew all about his weekend plans. Kesha’s probably off drowning in glitter and grinding with Katy at a club somewhere, and Justin’s up in his room being a sulky teenager because Selena just dumped him. He is also demanding muffins.
Kris’ weekend plans went from “lots of hot sex with his boyfriend” to “bake muffins and baby-sit whiny little brother.” Where did it all go wrong?
“Kriiiiiis!”
Kris lets his head hit the kitchen counter with a loud thunk. Adam laughs, reaching over to rub the back of his neck soothingly.
“It’s okay, baby. There’ll be other weekends.”
“But it was supposed to be this one,” he whines, leaning into his boyfriend and hiding his face in his neck.
He hums sympathetically, burying a hand in Kris’ hair and rubbing some of the tension away. “I know. I’m not exactly happy either, but the kid just got his heart broken. Helping him out’s more important than getting ours.”
Kris sighs loudly. “You’re right. I know you’re right.”
“Kriiiiiis!”
“But does he have to be such a little snot about it?” he grumbles, burrowing deeper into Adam’s arms like it’ll block out Justin’s calls.
“He wouldn’t be Justin if he didn’t,” he says, kissing the top of Kris’ head before pushing him out of his embrace. “Now stop whining and make him his damn muffins; maybe then he’ll shut up.”
~*~
